the big one (x2)

this morning was stressful. the test of all tests. the big one. all of the things from this past year came down to passing this one test..i wasn't so much concerned about just passing the test, but if i failed i would have to keep dealing with this school, and i really don't think i could handle that. i read a 1200+ page book cover to cover and then some in prep for this test, if that shows you just how much i did not want to be stuck with them for any longer. and guess what...

i passed!!!!

my heart was beating way fast the whole test, how lame. i stalled out at the submit button at the end, may have freaked out a little, clicked it, and i passed! i cannot even begin to explain to you how excited i am. the freaking roller coaster ride is over. it's over! no more tests for this school! 6 more clinicals, 2 little assignments, then DONE!

thank god. thanks for the prayers. thanks for the encouragement.

so what's the plan now? well...ANYTHING I WANT! we're about to go to a movie, then to the Spot with some friends to cheer on the Baylor basketball boys who play in NYC tonight...tomorrow = floating in the ocean with laura and MA if the weather's nice. (oh yah, they passed 2! yaaaaay!!!) maybe fishing? sandcastles? no school? P.E.R.F.E.C.T.I.O.N. 

in other news, my favorite little girl turned the big ONE today! Happy Birthday to miss Kylie Brooke! look at how CUTE she is! she must take after her favorite cousin ;)

43,200

that's what stands between me and graduation. in minutes. this also translates to...

one month.

2,628,000 seconds.

30 days.

one HUGE test.

8 clinical days.

a million frustrating school employees.

and one impossible clinical instructor.

today is a good day, in that it marks the beginning of the end of all of this. for fear of being permanently labeled a "negative nancy" or "debbie downer" or some other equally lame and non-positive name, i hesitate to vent yet again. but i'm doing it anyways. 

i am so far beyond frustrated with my school, the administration, and circumstances beyond our control. it is hard to remain positive when our hands are tied and there's nothing we can do to change situations that desperately need changing. and yes, my attitude stinks now. it does, i know. but regardless, i'm discouraged. and still have a lot to deal with. also, i'm applying for jobs, trying to figure out where i'll be next year, and basically just having a bad attitude. 

so here's where the request comes in. a request i don't often make. prayer. pray that i don't explode. and don't blow up on these ridiculous people. ha. kidding...kinda. but really. i'm stressed, even if it is overreacting. and i'm just overwhelmed. i need to do well on this test, i need to feel at peace about career decisions, i need to know the best ways to handle situations with difficult people in positions of power, i need an attitude adjustment, i need direction, i need...

i don't know what i need. what we need. what my class of 34 needs. all i know is what we don't need. and that's anymore barriers. or disrespect. or discouragement. or this school.

one month. dear lord, one month.

there's no place like home.

This time tomorrow, i will be packing my car and heading home! I'll only be there for 2 days, and have a lot to do while I'm there, but I still can't wait :) Why? Because I get to see these crazies...

    

see the family resemblance? 

it's colder than it oughta be in march.

I wish it would hurry up and warm up around here. (If you know me well, I'm sure your jaw just hit the floor after hearing that comment come from me, queen of "I'm Hot.")

It has been rainy and cold for days. To be honest, I really like this kind of weather, strange as that may be. But it makes my productivity and motivation levels plummet. All I want to do is lie around all day, wrapped up in a blanket, watching movies or something equally as non-school-related.

Current weather aside, I really just want it to be warm, sunny, and not raining. This is beach weather! And after March 31st, all I will have left is 6 clinical days and graduation. 

So in between my days at the hospital come the days of hanging out at the pool, fishing, floating in the ocean, crabbing, building sandcastles, running on the beach? Marking things off of our "GTown List". Hop a cruise last minute?  The possibilities are endless people, and I for one cannot freaking wait.

This was the topic of discussion yesterday on our way home from our 2nd day of 8 hour test review, the 2nd day of "spring break."  Of course, this is all assuming I can tackle the exit exam on the first attempt. That being said, I'm off for day 3 of the oh-so-fun 8 hours of test review. Tomorrow? Day 4.

A Box of 96!

Today marks the start of a three week marathon of mayhem and deadlines that I'm hoping we will all survive. The odds of survival are in our favor, but for the sake of being dramatic I'll leave it as questionable. 

After spending the first half of the day at Moody Library (UTMB, not Baylor's Moody Library, unfortunately) and getting sufficiently stressed out about, well, life in general I came home to a fun little surprise in my mailbox...some people just know how to make this pseudo-adult kid's day brighter. 

So in case there was any question of whether or not my grandparents are the coolest around, this should answer it. Yes, they're cool. Beyond cool. They send jumbo coloring books, jumbo boxes of crayons, and fun markers. And basically I just love them. A lot.