"Here Ikie Ikie Ikie!"

So this is just a quick excited update to say that we might get to evacuate tomorrow for the hurricane! "Get to evacuate"?!?! Yes, it's an exciting thing! Not the chance of destruction and damage, but the chance of getting a "free pass" to go to Austin for the weekend! So currently Mary Alice and I are sitting here drinking Red Bull, researching ol' Ike, texting with Laura, waiting for word about if we will be required to go to our clinicals this weekend, and calling Ike our way..."Here Ikie Ikie Ikie!!!" I'm about to go get gas in my car just in case! (Then we are going on a Historical Home Tour and to play tennis...obvi we are REALLY scared about the 'cane haha).

             

CONFESSION: I'm a Recovering Addict

I have a confession. I am in recovery. From a very serious addiction. An addiction that wreaked havoc on my life for the past month, taking my social life, routine, and productivity level and turning them upside down. Every morning I would wake up and tell myself that today would be different. But alas the night would come, and once again I would give in. Night after night, for three weeks straight. This addiction was short-lived. I'm now on the road to recovery, trying to find a way to move on.

So what is this addiction I speak of? I have no doubt this addiction hits very close to home for some of you. In fact, I have a feeling that many of you are experiencing the same trials of recovery I am now experiencing. My addiction? I feel it necessary to give it some formality...

"Hi, my name is Jessica, and I'm a recovering Olympics-aholic."

Well, there you have it folks...the SUMMER 2008 OLYMPICS! How great they were and how quickly they left me.

I loved them. I loved every second of them. From the opening ceremonies (yes, I admit to being one of the sappy ones who fell in love with Yao Ming's little friend from the earthquake) to the closing ceremonies (minus the yellow suits and white visors), I loved it all.

What's not to love? I mean, Ohh Emm Geee people!!!, this stuff was like crack in TV form! Shawn, Nastia, Michael, Sonya, Misty May...my new best friends! Sure, friendship usually requires the other person to be even slightly aware of your existence, but in this case I feel it's okay to make an exception. I love them. And in my addict's mind, I will choose to believe they knew I was rooting for them, on the other side of the screen. (or other side of the world, however you want to think about it). The point is, I was obsessed!

It's really a good thing that I was out of school during this time, because starting 8-8-08, life as I knew it was no more. My nights were spent watching balance beam routines and swimming races, and my days were spent contemplating where the female Chinese gymnast's fountain of youth possibly could be. *(I mean, they must be sitting on a fortune...to be 16+ years old and look like you're 9 is a miracle! Someone seriously needs to bottle whatever it is they're drinking, slap a label on it, ship it to the good ol' US of A, and BAM! You've got yourself an instant fortune! ORRRR, on second thought, someone needs to stop lying on documents and stop putting babies on Olympic teams! Whatever, back to the point).* If I had been in school, I surely would have failed, seeing as the Olympics take precedence over all.

But now I'm left, on the road to recovery. What am I supposed to do with my time without the Olympics? Yes, have a ridiculous amount of school/studying to do...but learning about chest tubes and pink frothy sputum doesn't quite have the same appeal. You get what I'm saying.

Well, I loved you Olympics of 2008, but the time has come that I must say so long old friend. It's time for me to move on, and stop living in the past. The past 8 days have been dull without you, and there are sure to be more boring days ahead. It gives me hope to know that I will see you in Vancouver in 2010 and then again in London in 2012. But until then, I'll be here. Waiting. And practicing my badmitton skills so I have a chance at being on some Olympic team. Because badmitton is the most hardocre Olympic sport there is.

Back to the BLOG World

Multiple people have informed me that I am long overdue for a new post, and that my last post was too depressing...here you go, this is for y'all :) Just a QUICK update and I promise I'll post more soon, and post some pics 2!

Since the whole "cloudy days" thing, a lot has happened. I think being happy and content can sometimes be a decision. So I decided to like it here, decided to try new things, and decided to stop bitching about anything and everything that was not perfect. We made a list of "THINGS TO DO IN GALVESTON BEFORE APRIL 24," and we are slowly marking things off of the list (and adding on every now and then as new things come up!). I'll keep you posted on the G-Town List adventures.

I just got back a couple of days ago from a 2 and a half week break from school. I crammed A LOT into that time! It was fun to see ppl, nice to get away, and a good mental break. And in a weird way, I wasn't 100% dreading coming back. That is a positive sign. There are several people I REALLY wanted to see over the break and I didn't get a chance 2 (McCrady and Miller, for example...dangit). But hopefully soon! And I'm trying to make it to BU Homecoming, so I'll get to see people there!

Okay, I'm off to grocery shop then study...2 of my most favorite things to do. Ha. I promise to post more soon!

Cloudy Days

We've had some cloudy days lately...it seems like everyone in my program has been really discouraged. I feel like we've just been waiting for the sun to break through the clouds, and it just hasn't happened quite yet. At this point, I think we're all just holding on 'til our break in August.

We started our preceptorships this week. We just completed our first rotation of group clinicals, and now we're assigned to one specific nurse and we each work their schedule for the next 3 weeks. I did not enjoy the group clinicals. Not at all really. I consistently left the hospital discouraged. Leadership in those situations dictates a lot of how our confidence levels and attitudes will be, and we didn't have much help in that area. I lucked out and got a got preceptor, after being switched from a different one and then being told I was going to have to work at the hospital jail. I'm pretty sure mention of the jail (and rushing all my clearance paperwork through bc it would already be late at that point) was the last thing I needed to hear that day, and my clinical instructor and the floor supervisor could see that written all over my face, and so I found a preceptor on the floor I had been working on. But that's not the case with all of my friends. Preceptors-not always so good. So here we are, thrown into a new environment, new responsibilities, new expectations, little guidance, and basically zero encouragement. We are working 12hr shifts day after day on top of studying for ridiculous tests, while still trying to 'make new friends, and keep the old'. It's all manageable and doable, but here's the kicker...(and I can't believe I'm about to actually admit this, but here it is...)

At this point, I'm not even sure I like nursing. And the problem is, that is how most of my friends here are feeling too, which doesn't help the overall morale. I have put my life on hold for what I felt was preparation for a career that is perfect for my life's passions and purposes, and now I'm consistently discouraged. Sounds ridiculous, I know. And I keep telling myself that I will enjoy it a lot more when I am in an area/unit that is more specific to what I want to do. (right now I'm on a general medicine floor). We are learning some very interesting stuff (I secretly like school sometimes). The patient interaction is my favorite part. I will go almost the whole 12 hour shift questioning why I'm here and why I'm doing this, but one smile from a patient, or one sweet word of affirmation brightens up the day. Nursing opens up so many doors and opportunities, and I'm praying my attitude will change. I'm sure this is just an attitude problem and I just need to 'put on my big girl panties and deal with it.' Yes?

I just feel like I keep pushing off "starting my life." I have known since junior high what I wanted to do with my life. What I am here for, what my purpose is. It hasn't changed. And I never seem to get there. I've changed the path to getting there a million times. Am I making my life take detours for fear of actually achieving my goals? Scared of reckless abandonment in exchange for a fruitful life? Am I scared to loose connections here? Am I being obedient? What am I supposed to do with my life here Lord?!?!

I want to be overseas... Loving on kiddos all day. Loving people. Teaching parents how to best provide for their family. Encouraging and empowering women. Swooping up orphans in my arms and giving them the biggest hug they've ever had. Sitting down at a feasting table with precious children who haven't had a good meal in who knows how long. Loving the Lord with all of me, and letting that overflow onto everyone around me. (Idealist?)

Yes, I can get there with nursing. But when? It's just discouraging. I feel like my life will never 'start'. AHHH....Until then, I'm still here. Thanking God for a couple of precious friends I've made here, without whom I don't know what I'd do. Praying for a positive attitude, clarity, and affirmation that I'm right where He desires for me to be. Praying the same for the rest of my classmates who feel the same way right about now. And the sun will break through the clouds soon.

Birthdays full of Blessings

This past week both of my grandparents celebrated big birthdays...my grandma ("Nini") turned 80 and my grandpa ("Pop-Pop") turned 83!

If you've known me for longer than a week it's quite possible you've heard me talk about how awesome my grandparents are...maybe you've even heard me say something to the effect of "I'm like seriously OBSESSED with my grandparents! Seriously!"...but in an attempt to ditch the Baylor-girl lingo in exchange for real-word vernacular I'll simply say that I really enjoy my grandparents company...hmm, yah, no...that's not gonna work...."I'M LIKE SERIOUSLY OBSESSED WITH MY GRANDPARENTS! SERIOUSLY!"...yah, that sounds more like it! :) Obsession is a strong word, I know. But if you had grandparents like this, you'd be obsessed too! Why you ask? Because I will forever have these cherished memories with two of the most important people in my life...

-Nini had a special pink teddy bear sippy cup that had the inexplicable ability to make us feel better in seconds.

-My grandma spent countless hours on the floor playing with us and reading books to us...I'm talking "Danny the Dinosaur" here!...it doesn't get much better than that

-Baking Christmas cookies with my Nini EVERY SINGLE YEAR since I was born...going on 23 years of cookie baking! Mmm Mmm

-When we would spend the night, we would get "sandwich treasures" in our school lunch...made everyone jealous haha

-They would come to our house at ridiculously early hours on Christmas just to make sure they saw what Santa brought us...and Nini never fails to make her famous Frederick coffee-cake (ps-I still make them come early on Christmas morning...they secretly love it. I think? haha)

-My Pop-Pop always had donuts for breakfast...always! We did NOT have that at home, that's for sure!

-My Pop-Pop teased us 24/7 growing up...He is a funny funny guy and keeps us smiling!

-My grandparents are the type of people who would do anything for anybody. I have a feeling my grandma would give the shirt off her back if someone needed it. They both love completely with their ever-expanding hearts, and love unconditionally. They have become surrogate grandparents to my friends, and to countless people at their church and, well, pretty much everywhere they go!

-You know that cute couple that still holds hands everywhere they go? And you can just see how hopelessly in love with eachother they are after almost 60 years...you know, the couple that every person dreams of being when they grow up? The people that restore your faith in true love and in relationships grounded in respect and addoration...yah, my grandparents are those people! (good example, that's for sure!)

-They love the Lord. Love the church. Love their family and friends. Love eachother.

Basically, they bless me immeasurably. I love them more than mere words can express. I do not take it for granted that in my life I have had the privilege of knowing 3 grandparents, and for having my Nini and Pop-Pop be so deeply invested in my daily life for so long!

Happy Birthday Nini! Happy Birthday Pop-Pop! I love you both! :)

Creepy, Crawly, COCKROACHES!!!

Even the title is enough to gross you out I'm sure! Well, let me take you back to my past 2 nights. So I was sitting in my living room around midnight two nights ago...I was sitting there studying and watching 27 Dresses. When all of a sudden, out of nowhere, a ridiculously HUGE Cockroach flew onto my wall. And let me tell you, this was not your average cockroach (as if any cockroach can be considered average?). This thing was MASSIVE. I'm talking the type of thing found in Will Smith's dreams, the perfect start to the next Men in Black movie! After my initial freak out at my disgusting new roommate, I made sure to take a picture for your viewing pleasure. It was literally more than 2 inches long, and had little antenna things that were probably 1.5inches longer, and its wings kept moving back and forth. The picture doesn't fully capture it in its full glory, but here ya go!

Don't be impressed with my bravery...I zoomed in. You think I would really get this close? Well, actually, I did. I had to! I couldn't let this thing just stay in my apartment right?!?! So my first plan of action, text message people for moral support. Okay, I'm ridiculously grossed out by 2 things...Rats and Roaches. I've had one rat experience in Galveston already, which I'll talk about later, and now this is a roach situation I was not prepared to handle. Dramatic? Yes. But that's me, and I needed people to know, so I texted, in the middle of the night, with picture attached. Nobody seemed overly panicked, so I was on my own. This is where the ridiculousness comes in. By this point, Baylie had noticed this new little friend on the wall, and had parked herself on the floor right in front of it, never taking her eyes off of it. So it was okay for me to go prepare for the roach removal, because if that roach made any sudden movements, I'm sure Baylie would have jumped up that wall so fast and goodbye Cockroach! (Baylie does NOT need a cockroach snack, she's getting fat as it is, and she's too cute to have cockroach breath.) So I got a plastic sack and put it inside out on my arm, got 3 paper towels to grab him with (the thicker the better, you dont' want to feel the CRUNCH! haha), and set off to get him! (I put socks on too, cuz if it got away from me, I did NOT want it running across my bare feet!) I snuck up, took a deep breath, and BAM! Went in for the kill! It got away!!!! It flew off the wall (towards me!) and went behind the tv...I'm literally screaming and dancing around like a pansy at this point (I'm sure the neighbors love me). I moved everything out, and walked around the living room, on the furniture, with cool socks on, with my arm covered in a paper sack, trying to catch the dang bug. How cool am I? I was NOT happy! To make it better, while I'm doing this, I see a baby roach by my front door! What the heck?!?! (I live less than a block from the ocean, and the bay is right behind my apartment...they come up from the water. My friend Laura lives in the same complex and her and her husband have seen them also, so don't think my apt is disgusting!)

I got the baby, but not the gigantic one. I went to sleep that night with cotton rounds rolled up in my ears (I would have used cotton balls, but I was out, so I improvised.). Why would I have cotton in my ears? All I could think about was the roach crawling into my ears while I was sleeping, and having roach babies in my head! So cotton it was. Sticking out of my head. Picture Shrek, minus the green. I woke up the next morning to Baylie pulling them out of my ears haha.

But last night, I got payback. The same exact time, in a different room, I was studying again. (Notice a theme? Studying in the middle of Friday and Saturday nights? So cool, I know). The thing made its grand entrance once again! This time I was ready. Same routine, same ridiculous looking Jessica, but this time, SUCCESS! After a 10 minute chase around the room, and several minor crisis diverted, my new roommate was dead. Crushed and suffocated and triple bagged in the trash (not taking any chances that he could get out!). Wow, I'm an exterminator now. Who could have guessed it? So after this entirely way too long story about a disgusting little creature, this post is over. Just wanted to get sympathy where I can. I'm sure most of you fellow roach-haters can understand. This was no normal situation. But I survived, with a little over-dramaticness on the side.

Picnics, Parks, and ...Thunderstorms?

So apparently it's a tradition for the faculty of the Bacc2 program to give us a picnic/party to celebrate the 1/2 way point of the summer semester...they told us that they realize how busy we've been/how insane the workload they've given us has been. So they gave us a picnic. We had "scheduled fun!" (and the funny part is, it was supposed to be LAST Tuesday, but they overbooked us, and had to push it back a week..haha).

So yesterday was the day of the picnic! We had an exam in the morning, seminar on campus, then we were all going to head out to Galveston State Park for the picnic...as we're sitting in seminar, we hear thunder...and more thunder, louder and louder! [For those of you who thought Baylor parking was bad, you've never been to UTMB...it's ridiculous! Our parking tags are only for street parking, and the signs where we park all say "This area FLOODS when raining."...apparently cars have floated away. cool?] Anyways, everyone had to go move their cars, in the rain...after that little event was over, we get a call from the instructor in charge of the picnic..."Picnic's on, rain or shine!" Usually, we'd blow it off and just not go (you should have seen the lightning over the water...insane!), but this was our one shot at non-study/non-school time, and we were going! Picnic or bust...

It ended up being a really fun time! I've been with the same people day in and day out for the past 2 months, but it's always in a lab, test, or clinical setting. There are a couple of girls I hang out with regularly, and I love them!...but most of these people I've only seen in scrubs. (who knew they actually had clothes other than burnt orange scrubs?!?) Not everyone lives on the island, so the only time 1/2 of them are here is for class stuff...so it was fun to be able to just hang out with everyone w/o having to be focused on school. Our instructors cooked briscuit and beans, a million different side dishes, & baked homemade cookies...I was impressed.

We pretty much watched the dark clouds roll on in and saw the lightning/heard the thunder all around us...but the rain held off! (well, for the most part...look at the pics...the hair is evidence of the not so great weather, but whatev). There are 2 guys in the program (2 guys, 38 girls...sounds like Baylor), and they brought surf boards and a skim board (?)...a couple ppl tried their luck at that...I did not. I watched. Can you see me trying to surf for the first time in front of 30+ ppl? Most embarassing moment just waiting to happen!

The beach was fun, the people were fun, and we didn't get pooped on by the seagulls...that makes it a great day :)

This is our practice celebration for April 2009! (GRADUATION!!!)

Mary Alice...my first friend in Galveston (and maybe the only other one w/o family in the area?)...we keep each other sane (or try to)

This is majority of the Bacc2 group!

Some of my favorites :)